he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
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