you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
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There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
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My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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