i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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