i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Randomize
