just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
