so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
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We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
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You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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