wake up i wanna do it froggy style
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Randomize
