I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize
