I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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