belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
Randomize
