oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
please don't ironically join a cult
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
Randomize
