is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
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