I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
what day is it and did you see me today?
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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