Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize