You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
i out mim tonsoeep
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
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