I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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