I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
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