Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
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