goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize