I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Women Confess 25 Instant Deal-Breakers On A Man’s Dating Profile
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.