i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
