I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
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