where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Proof That Kendall Jenner Is The Queen of Cannes
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
The 21 Worst Ways People Have Been Dumped
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.