I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.