all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
