I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
My vagina is officially offended.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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