But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
