i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Randomize
