So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
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