and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
