She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
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