We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
My vagina is officially offended.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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