we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
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