Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
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