Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize