its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Randomize