goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
