Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
