As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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