yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Randomize
