You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
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