why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize
