I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
