So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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