But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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