My girlfriend figured out who you are.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize