just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.