I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
