I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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