Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize