Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize
